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The forecast called for 100% chance of beauty and emotion and a 50% chance of rain.
As everyone watched the bride and her father begin their walk, the first drop on the cheek was rain, not a tear. A downpour blew through as I talked about Kent.
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| First Drop of Rain |
What follows are the prepared remarks without the ad libs.
* * * * *
Welcome.
On behalf of Kent and Kate . . . thank you all for being here today. I know they hold all of you dear in their hearts.
We are gathered here today to consecrate,
celebrate and bear witness to the marriage of Kate and Kent and the love they
share.
I’m Kent’s Uncle Jeff, from across the
river in Oregon.
Of course, I’ve known Kent all of his life, but we really did not get to know each other until he after he grew up and moved out West.
When he lived in Utah, Kent was responsible for the lives and well-being of
troubled kids during week-long wilderness outings. I saw witnessed his toughness as he fought through emotional exhaustion from week after
week of hyper-vigilance to ensure the children did not run off or hurt themselves
or hurt each other. Although he now
treats patients in an office, Kent remains responsible for the lives of people.
I’ve also seen Kent, the man of adventure. He was a white-water rafting guide, running down these dangerous rivers like they were water slides. I was around when Kent, along with Dave here, decided to march 18 miles
in the December snow -- without snowshoes -- to summit a peak about 25 miles northwest
of here.
Kent has a positive attitude, sly sense
of humor, and he revels in life’s gifts.
Kent, I am very proud of the intelligent, resilient, and caring man you’ve become.
Then, he brings Kate into our lives, and I think, wow!
How can such a sweet and loving person
also be so driven and accomplished?
Kate’s
life has been crazy the past couple of years.
Doctor Kelley took her turn saving lives at a hospital in an isolated town
on the Oregon Coast for about six months. Back in Portland,
the Portland Hospital put her on night
shifts for a time, and she had a stretch where she worked 12 days on and two days off. Twelve days in a row! We met for dinner at the end of one of these
shifts. She was physically beat: pasty complexion, eyes half shut. Normal humans might be snarly or just curl up
with a home video and not even try to be social. Yet, somehow, Super-Kate managed to keep her
eyes open and pleasantly engage in intelligent conversation on a variety of
topics with my wife Allyson and me.
Then there was the time they visited us
at our mountain cabin. In effect, Kate did a triathlon. She ran in the morning. We all went on pretty strenuous hike up and
down hills for three hours. Then, Kate
and Kent bicycled 12 miles.
Every
time I’ve been around
Kate, no matter what the circumstances, she has always radiated positivity and warmth.
Kate, I hope you realize what an amazing woman you are.
Bottom line? Standing before us, are two strong, deep-thinking,
caring, wonderful people who deserve each other.
Kate and Kent, all of us here love you
deeply. You bring a richness of joy,
pride and love to all of us. We are blessed to have both of you in our lives.
We are all here to support you today. . .
and to support you throughout your life together.
With God’s blessings, the words we will
speak today are sacred and affirm a lasting bond between Kate and Kent, who
have already joined their hearts and have chosen to walk together on their
life's journey.
We all have roles in this wedding.
First
up is Lauren O’Flaherty. She is Kent’s Sister in law.
Lauren will read a poem by Joyce Grenfell entitled "Ordinary Morning."
Please pay attention to the words with this question in mind: Why did Kent choose this poem?
Lauren reads:
It felt like an ordinary morning
It began an ordinary way
And then, without warning
Became and extraordinary day.
Hadn’t the slightest sort of inkling-
No-one said love was on its way-
And then within a twinkling
Without the smallest inkling
It became an extraordinary day.
For there you were
And the whole world stood still.
There you were,
I loved you then and I always will.
At first, an ordinary morning,
Began in an ordinary way,
And then my heart was beating
At this ordinary meeting
And we both knew
This was not an ordinary day.
Thank you Lauren.
Did you guess the answer?
Like most men his age, Kent had been on a
few first dates that lead nowhere. Maybe
more than a few. Yet, within the first
couple of minutes of sitting down with Kate, he knew that she was the one for him.
Next
up is Laura Hill
Laura is one of Kate’s dear friends from
right here in Portland.
Laura will read a love poem by e e
Cummings called I carry your Heart with Me
As
Laura approaches, . . . one thing to remember about a wedding that does not
follow a prescribed liturgy is that every reading was selected by the bride or
groom because it is particularly meaningful to them. Kate selected this poem.
Laura Reads
i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet0 i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than should can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
Thank you,
Laura.
When
Kate and Kent offered me the honor of officiating, we all pondered the
question: “Why do we cry at weddings?”
The answer, I suppose, is - it
depends.
For the younger folks, it’s our Disney
fantasy come true: find the right man or woman and live happily ever
after.
For the older folks, we know that a
wedding is not the story’s end with a vague future. Rather a wedding
proclaims a new beginning as a couple.
There will be highs and lows, thrills,
and disappointments. The older folks know that with each joyful event,
with every relaxed and contented evening, and with every challenge surmounted,
love deepens. The fire engine red of today’s passion will mature, almost
imperceptibly, to a deep complex ruby that neither Kent nor Kate can comprehend
fully today.
Or maybe they can
because they are not hormonal teenagers with
limited life experience.
Some people say the best weddings have
nothing to do with crazy logistics, like jumping out airplanes -- although
being here in the Columbia River Gorge National Scenic Area is pretty darn
awesome.
The best weddings, they say, are those in
which the we are convinced the couple will enjoy a fulfilling lifetime together
founded upon the bedrock of mutual understanding and love.
Today, we all have the pleasure of being
a part of such a wedding.
Kate and Kent each have significant
experience in life and with each
other
- Each has gone through their evolutions of character in their 20s.
- They know what they want out of life, and
- They are ready for the next chapter
For some of us, a hard day at work means dealing with a disagreeable co-worker or nasty
customer or the loss of a business opportunity.
By contrast, Kent and Kate have already
been there for each other after days at work when the lives of other human
beings hung in the balance. Each has
returned home from workdays that kicked their butts emotionally, and the other
has propped them back up for the next day.
And
they have a ton of fun with each other. They get out into nature rain and shine, get together with friends over meals or a beer,
play with the dogs at the Oregon coast or anywhere, or just sit with
each other and their dogs on their couch . . . and laugh out loud.
So, unlike naïve teenagers who assume it will be happily ever after, Kate
and Kent know and value what
they have in each other.
But . . . much like giddy teenagers, Kent and Kate’s hearts swell with love for
each other.
Because
they stand before us
with their overflowing hearts - all of
our own hearts, young and old, fill with their love.
And.
Our hearts fill with love for our own wives and husbands as we remember
standing in their shoes.
Our hearts fill with the love of family, however configured.
Our hearts fill with love and gratitude for our moms and dads and grandmas and grandpas and the generations
before us, whose love and struggles made us possible.
And, hearts fill with the love of
God and His sacrifice.
Next
to speak from the Bible is, Stacy Rizzo, one of Kate’s very best friends, who will read verses
selected by Kate.
Stacy
Reads
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is
not arrogant or rude.
It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or
resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the
truth.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all
things, endures all things.
Love never ends.
As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they
will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for
their labor:
If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly
broken.
Thank
you Stacy.
Next up is Carrie Matlock, Kent’s Cousin,
who will read a quotation from the Amber Spyglass by Philip Pullman:
Carrie Reads
Till I die and after I die, and when I find my way out of
the land of the dead, I'll drift about forever, all my atoms, till I find you
again... I'll be looking for you, every moment, every single moment.
And when we do find each other again, we'll cling together
so tight that nothing and no one'll ever tear us apart. Every atom of me and
every atom of you... We'll live in birds and flowers and dragonflies and pine
trees
and in clouds and in those little specks of
light you see floating in sunbeams... And when they use our
atoms to make new lives, they won't just be able to take one, they'll have to
take two, one of you and one of me, we'll be joined so tight..."
Thank you Carrie
I know a few of you would be looking for a program about now. But there is no written program. So, here’s what’s next.
·
Exchange
of Vows
·
The
exchange of Rings and then
·
The
tying the knot.
·
Then,
you all will stand and speak the Irish wedding blessing on that card.
·
Followed
by me pronouncing them husband and wife.
So, now, the
Exchange
of Vows
Kate
and Kent, your love is something that you both cherish so much it’s compelled
you to join in the union of marriage - dedicating your lives to the happiness and
support of each other. The vows you make
today express your love and devotion to one another and will support your
marriage throughout your lives.
Kent,
you first,
[Kent speaks * * *]
Repeat after me
“I, Kent Michael O’Flaherty, take you Katherine
Ann Kelly to be my wife;
·
to
have and to hold,
·
for
better, for worse,
·
for
richer, for poorer,
·
in
sickness and in health,
·
to
love and to cherish from this day forward.
Kate,
your turn to say what
you like to your future husband
[Kate
speaks * * * ]
Repeat after me
“I, Katherine Ann Kelly, take you Kent Michael
O’Flaherty to be my husband,
·
to
have and to hold,
·
for
better, for worse,
·
for
richer, for poorer,
·
in
sickness and in health,
·
to
love and to cherish from this day forward.
Exchange
of Rings.
May I have the rings. [From Dave and So]
Since ancient times, the ring has been a
symbol of the unbroken circle of love, with no beginning and no end.
Love given freely has no giver and no
receiver, for each is the giver and each is the receiver. May these rings
always remind you of your love and the promises you made here today.
Kate repeat after me:
“Kent, with this ring I thee wed.”
Kent repeat after me:
“Kate, with this ring I thee wed.”
Now Kent and Kate are going
to tie the Knot.
Throughout history, the hands of the bride and groom were bound as a sign of their commitment to one another.
Tying the hands represents the joining of your two lives into one common purpose. It represents your future, secure in the knowledge your relationship will continue to be strong no matter what.
The ceremonial cord we use today was handmade in Ireland - on the Aran Islands in County Galway, which is the ancestral home of the O'Flaherty clan.
Will the moms come forward to Tie the Knot?
Throughout history, the hands of the bride and groom were bound as a sign of their commitment to one another.
Tying the hands represents the joining of your two lives into one common purpose. It represents your future, secure in the knowledge your relationship will continue to be strong no matter what.
The ceremonial cord we use today was handmade in Ireland - on the Aran Islands in County Galway, which is the ancestral home of the O'Flaherty clan.
Will the moms come forward to Tie the Knot?
[Lorie and Patty tie the knot and return to their seats]
On your wedding day, these are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you.
These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as you build your future together.
These are the hands that will hold your children tenderly.
These hands, join our families as one; they join all of us gathered here today as one large family of choice, not only blood.
and
These are also the hands that will take out the garbage, clean the kitchen counter and pick up dog poop. I want you to think about how much you love each other each time you take out the trash.
And, lastly, these are the hands that
even when wrinkled and aged
will still reach for yours
and will always give you unspoken affection with just a touch
Now,
everybody.
Please stand and take out the card with
the Irish Wedding Blessing.
We are all going to speak this together.
Kent
and Kate, please face your family and friends
No mumbling. Speak loudly.
On three:
One,
Two,
May the road
rise to meet you,
May the wind
be always at your back,
May the sun
shine warm upon your face,
The rain
fall soft upon your field,
And until we
meet again May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
I
now pronounce you husband and wife.
You
may kiss your bride and your groom.
* * * * * * *
Wedding Location: Skamania Lodge, Stevenson, Washington
Latitude: 45.68582
Longitude: -121.90298
Wedding Video:
http://www.tracktionproductions.com/weddingvideo/h8049321a#h8049321a
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| Morning |
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Bagpiper Before Wedding |
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| Knot Tied |
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| 1950 Wedding |
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| 2003 wedding |
http://www.tracktionproductions.com/weddingvideo/h8049321a#h8049321a
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